ADHD Made Simple: Tips for Parents from a Childhood Therapist
By Jamie Heimos, LPC, NCC, M.Ed
“He is bouncing off the walls!”
“Earth to Zoey, are you in there?”
“Oh my gosh, he never settles down.”
We’ve heard these phrases before as parents. We recall seeing the kid(s) that are bouncing off the walls or have their head in the clouds. Chances are with either of these observations, they have Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder or ADHD.
Does this diagnosis seem to be popping up more and more? According to the CDC, ADHD affects about 9.8% of children between the ages of 3 and 17 years, affecting boys three times more than girls.
Rates seem to be on the steady rise, however, we don’t have recent data to make this conclusion just yet. The most recent data is from 2019, however, it does seem many are more willing to accept and understand this diagnosis than they were a decade ago.
In my practice at Balance & Bloom Counseling and Play Therapy in Wildwood, MO, I would guess half, if not more, of my caseload is with children/teens with ADHD. We are certainly seeing more acceptance and more people looking to help support their children.
What is ADHD?
ADHD is a neurodevelopmental disorder that affects the way the brain organizes information. ADHD can be organized into two different types, you can have the “head in the clouds” type of ADHD (inattentive type) or “bouncing off the walls” (hyperactive type) or a combination of the two.
Overall, we look at different executive functioning skills when looking at a person with ADHD. Our executive functioning skills are things like
- Organization
- Time management
- Planning
- Flexible thinking
- Focus/attention
- Emotional control
- Impulse control
- Working memory.
Looking at each of these skills, there are things we can do to work through navigating these deficits.
How can therapy help?
In the play therapy space, we can teach children a variety of skills to help them manage their ADHD symptoms and understand how to self-monitor more appropriately. Oftentimes, children with hyperactive ADHD are impulsive, lack self-awareness and emotional control. There are a lot of ways to help children with these deficits and this looks different for every child based on their family situations, peer relationships, and schooling environments. One of the biggest pieces I work on with children with ADHD includes calm-down skills with tools like breathing strategies, identifying activities they enjoy doing alone like reading or drawing, and finding sensory tools to help with their energy levels.
Two of my favorite relaxation strategies for kids include:
- Fire Hands- Rub your hands really fast together until they feel hot while taking a big deep breath in, then blow on your palms when you breathe out (do this several times)
- Melting- Pretend you are a snowman and melt each part of your body slowly to the ground. This is a good progressive muscle relaxation strategy to help kids identify what feelings they have in different parts of their body and relax them.
How can parents help?
Impulse and emotional control are both the two executive functioning skills that seem to have the biggest consequences in a child’s life in their relationships.
As parents, it is important to promote emotional development early on, especially for more hyperactive kids.
My top suggestions include modeling the behavior you expect, including lots of visuals and reminders, and talking through the conflicts. When we break down executive functioning skills more specifically, adding in things like the following can help to make symptoms more manageable for everyone
- Visual schedules or check-lists
- Visual timers (older kids can use Siri or Alexa to help with reminders too)
- Mood menus to identify feelings
- A Menu of calm- down choices
- Give one to two tasks at a time (ie. “I need you to get on your shoes.” wait until this is finished “I need you to get on your jacket” Wait until this is done “I need you to get your backpack.” rather than all three at one time)
- Give plenty of reminders before a transition in life or the classroom
- Give 2 to 3 choices at a time–too many can feel overwhelming
Outside of different visual aids and tools, it is important to consider your child’s diet, exercise, and time spent off screens.
Exercise is known to have positive effects on our child’s attention levels and help them to exert their energy in productive ways. An Occupational Therapist can also help with understanding your child’s sensory needs with ADHD.
While occupational therapy is out of my realm as a play therapist, any therapist would suggest minimizing screen time to help with a child’s behaviors. With children who lack time management, screen time can quickly become a struggle. Screen time can also increase ADHD symptoms due to the overstimulation of visuals causing brain chemicals to fire away.
A child with ADHD can’t always disconnect. Setting limits around screens is important to manage symptoms and behaviors for any child, but especially children with ADHD.
Now, this may be a wild or controversial topic but, I’m bringing in a few not-so-well-known support tips. For kids that suffer from ADHD, studies suggest caffeine can help boost dopamine levels which can help with inattention (please consult a doctor before doing this).
Other diet-based suggestions that are common for children include limiting sugar intake, taking vitamins and supplements like Zinc, B6, and Vitamin C, and limiting Red-Dye 40 intake.
Red-Dye 40 has no nutritional value and is primarily used as a color additive but has risks for children (as do many other food dyes). Red Dye 40 can be found in a lot of desserts, chips, popsicles, sodas, fruit snacks, and sports drinks. Studies link Red Dye 40 to increased hyperactivity, behavioral changes, and allergic-type reactions for all individuals but more exacerbated in individuals with ADHD. Reading your labels for these ingredients can be really helpful in managing some of these concerns. I’ve included this article from ADDitude Magazine here with more information about food dyes and the effect it has on children and their behaviors.
How do you know if you should look into medication?
I always tell parents to trust their gut. If you feel your child is not meeting their full potential, talk to your doctor. If you feel your home life and your child’s school life is moderately to severely disrupted by your child’s behaviors due to ADHD, consult your doctor. Medication is helpful for many, however, it does also have side effects that can cause further stressors for family members including poor diet and poor sleep schedules.
Wow, so what's next?
This is a lot of information we just covered and this doesn’t even fully scratch the surface. If you feel your child may be demonstrating some of the symptoms of ADHD, reach out to your child’s pediatrician, their school counselor, a child psychologist or a therapist.
There are so many wonderful childhood therapists available to help you navigate this road. We have a wealth of information at our fingertips, but ultimately you’re the caregiver, and if your gut says, “Something isn’t right here” trust that. You know your child best.
Favorite Books/Resources about this topic
For Kids:
Mrs. Gorski, I Think I Have the Wiggle Fidgets by Barbara Esham
What Should Danny Do by Ganit and Adir Levy (Teaches about Consequences)
Button Pusher by Tyler Page (Content warning: domestic violence, for middle school and up, Graphic Novel)
For Parents:
Smart but Scattered by Peg Dawson
References:
ADHD: Non-Medication Treatments and Skills for Children and Teens by Debra Burdick
https://www.cdc.gov/ncbddd/adhd/data.html
